It sounds so cliche to tell people I broke up with my boyfriend. I feel like everyone does it and therefore people are numb to what it really means...to what it potentially means. The usual response is an "Awww...I'm sorry (sympathetic rub on arm)." I don't feel like my breakup was the usual though. I've experienced the end of some of my relationships that hurt for a couple of days and then I got over them (I've also experienced the complete opposite). But this one was different. This wasn't some fun little fling with a convenient partner. It didn't end because we grew apart or he did something wrong. It wasn't because of fighting or not feeling understood by each other. We had a pure love...a very real love. Josh honestly was my best friend and my other half. Someone who knew me so completely and still loved me.
We knew we were doomed from the start. We knew we couldn't be together in the end due to our mutually exclusive religious views. We consciously chose to start something...and it was three of the happiest months of my life. He filled me up. He made me feel so complete. I felt like I could handle anything the world threw at me as long as he was by my side. But autumn came too quickly on our beautiful summer home in Denial-Land. And now there is a void in my life. It's been two months since the breakup and I've come a long way. I started this post back on April 4th but decided to finish it today. I'm grateful for the path that I've taken and for the lessons I've learned. Most of all, I'm grateful for the memories I have. The song lyrics from Wicked come to mind:
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for good
I have! Thank you Josh!
Oh, Marie, that is so sad and I'm so sorry. I suppose there was no way to reconcile both of your religious feelings so you could continue the relationship. I hope you're doing ok and you'll find somebody special someday soon. Right now I imagine you're not really looking but I hope you feel better soon.
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